How To Handle Stress

It's the new hot topic in town. The weather is changing so we have physical stress, exams are due so we have mental stress. Churches and the Body of Christ has numerous expectations so we have religious stress, boys are non-communicative and girls are confusing so we have relationshipal stress. The cafeteria food is getting old so we have digestive stress. Mom called (or didn't call) so we have family stress (disclaimer: this is not a statement said from personal experiance. I simply state what is happening on campus) The cousin went off the deep end and Auntie and Uncle are flipping out. So we have extended family stress. Yes, the two require two separate catagories.
She said this and he didn't say that, so does it mean they like each other, but wait I had tagged that one as MINE. Oh woops I just stuck my foot in my mouth, again. Do they wish they never met me?
The professors are stressed, the students are stressed, family members are stressed, the friends are stressed, I suspect even the dog is stressed.
Yippee!
So the answer is: Let's throw a stress-party! You must be ready to loose your mind and bring a snack to come. Costumes are preferable. No zombies though, please. Enough of us are pulling all-nighters to get the homework done, we don't need external reminders.

On a more serious note, a friend asked me today how she should handle all her stress. "Haha! FUNNY!" I thought to myself, as I have been asking myself the same question. I suggested praying and she looked around for her Old King James Bible to throw at me (believe me those things hurt when thrown!!) She couldn't find one, so told me to try again and added a few threats to my life (her dad is a marine and she does South American jujitsu on the side (not sure if that's how you spell jujitsue... jewjitsoo... jijitsew... hmmm...)
I asked how devotionals were going and she said fine. How was personal time with God? Fine. How was -
"FINE! Cut the Bible college crap and tell me how to get back in control of my life!"

Ahaa!

I cleared my throat. "Do you want me to give you the friendly college girly friend answer, or the Missions Major answer?"
(it's a running joke between us: She's an Apologetics major, so she'll be the one in a cushy office with plush leather and cherry-wood furniture creating theories and teaching them in a University somewhere, and I'll be out on the mission field actually living them out)
Her face began twisting itself so that it resembled something like a lemon, and with her eyebrows bouncing and her eyes squinting she said in something between a choke and a squeak,
"Give me the Missions Major answer!"
"You, my dear, are experiancing the lovely lesson of yeilding control to the Lord."
"Oh. Well, I didn't sign up for that class." She said, with an unspoken, "where do I send the email to remind the Professor that I'm not on His roll call list?"
"Uh, sorry, yes you did."
"WHEN?!"
"When you became a Christian. Consider yourself having enlisted in the Army as a grunt."
"No. Not Army. Especially not enlisted."
"Yup. Army. Consider it Army or the Concentration Camp." (Army being Life as a Christian, Concentration Camp being life without Christ)
"OKAY definately Army! Army is good. I can do Army. So how do I do army?"

So we talked some more and came up with a few basic 'rules':

1. Stop trying to keep control. You won't ever have it, even if you think you do.
Release it to God.
2. Don't try to go through it alone. Rely on God's strength and 'enlist' the help of the Body of Christ.
3. Ask others to pray for you
4. Pray if there is any sin you are unaware of (or aware of and not dealing with) that is keeping you from effectively hearing God's voice, and ask His help to deal with it.
5. Don't give up. Ask others to remind you to not give up. If you are in the will of God, then you will get through it one way or another!

We also discussed prayer journaling. A lot of times I forget that 1. it can be better than it is or 2. it could be a whole lot worse. If I journal my prayers, I can go back and read it and remind myself of God's bringing me through 'crisis' or when He has blessed me with a 'mountain top experiance.'

So there are the wise words from Dr. Rachel. Haha. That's a scary thought!

If you have any other brilliant insights as to how to handle stress, feel free to let me know!!
Now if you will excuse me, I have some homework I've been stressing about...

~Princess Ouch~

p.s. For those of you in need of a good laugh, here's this. I didn't write it:

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second
person
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a dust-buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.


GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair
that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you
the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1 -- You believe in Santa Claus. 2 -- You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3 -- You are Santa Claus. 4 -- You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is . . having money.
At age 50 success is .. . . having money.
At age 70 success is . .. having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.

Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.
Have a wonderful day with many smiles