I demand cheesepuffs!

Today at Friendship they were short-staffed in the nursery/daycare, so I opted to help out there instead of teaching English like I usually do.
Parenting is an art form, science, and stranger than science fiction. Okay granted it will be easier when its just one-on-one and not a flock of a dozen bi-lingual ducklings all the same age, but still.
They have free breakfast downstairs and I hadn't eaten anything, so I brought it back into the playroom with the 2-4 year olds. One little boy came and put his elbows on the table and grinned at me charmingly.
'That's mine.' he said, with all the smooths suave possible.
'Nope. It's mine.' I replied and smiled. He blinked. This was apparently not the usual response he was used to. He tried again, as maybe it was just a fluke.
'That is my food.' again, the dashing, charming smile.
'Nope. Its my food. And I am going to eat it all, and you can't have any.' I retorted politely. Yes, I was getting sadistic delight in being ornery and contrary and not having anyone quote some doctrine or theological retort followed by an exhortation for my sanctification. Unfortunately this poor kid was getting the brunt of it. However, he was not to be deterred.
'That's mine.' he said pointing at my coffee. Smart kid, willing to compromise. However, no way I'm giving a charming, calm 3 year old caffeine!
'That is my coffee. You can't have it. You can have juice, but not coffee.'
"I demand juice." a little voice chirped behind me. I turned and a tiny little girl bundled in a snow coat was looking at me with the seriousness of a United Nations Diplomat discussing human trafficking.
"You what?"
"I demand juice." she repeated.
'you demand juice?'
'Yes. I demand juice.'
Now, my friend Amber has told me about this child and her vocabulary, so I assumed it was unique to her. However, as the day progressed, either all the kids heard her and noticed the positive results, or that is just how one says it in Hindi. Or they've learned that asking doesn't yield the same results as demanding with a stone-cold face.
One little boy liked bringing me a book and having me point to the various animals, and we would say their names and the sounds that they made. Or we'd say colors and shapes. However the rest of them caught on and all would try to close the book I was reading and shove the book of their choice into my hands.
'but this mickey mouse!!' they would wheedle when I would insist that I'd finish the book on bugs before I started the book on Mickey's outdoor activities. In the midst of the girls calling for Simba and the one kid insisting that a sheep sounded like a goat throwing up, a little voice cheeped into my ear,
'Chai?' and proceeded to shove a plastic teacup into my nose.
'Oh, is this a cup of chai?'
'Yes teacher. This is chai.'
So now I was explaining that sheep 'baa' they don't "bloooeehgh,' assuring the one girl that yes we WOULD read Simba again AND I was drinking pretend chai.
"I demand this book.' the future diplomat stated again.
'Look what is with the demands?! You are in no position to demand anything.'
"I demand this book.' she repeated.
'Say please or I won't read it.'
"I demand this book please.'
'No. You say, 'will you read this book please?'
'Dis book please.'
Close enough.
Kids are smart little boogers, and the strange new word 'please' spread rather quickly. One kid went so far when I still insisted on finishing one book before starting another,
'Teacher teacher teacher pleeeeaaaase please this book please!'
Alright I've got to cave at SOME point so I gave in to this kid. But then he realized that he could now get his way and kept interrupting the books that he himself chose for a different book. Finally I said,
"Why don't you read to me?" The kid didn't have a problem with it and began pointing out animals and sounds but then discovered he didn't like this role reversal so much so went back to 'teacher teacher you please!'
Now not to get stereotypical, because I merely mean this following statement as a matter of observation and nothing more, but all these kids were from India. There were two girls from Korea who were quiet all this time until we got to snack time. Then when they wanted more cheesepuffs, but didn't want to finish their goldfish, they would tilt their head back and nod it down violently, with a firm declaration of 'PLEASE! Cheesepuffs PLEASE!' and then look at us expectantly.
'Finish your goldfish first.'
"PLEASE!" with the same violent nod, 'Cheesepuffs PLEASE!' And it was rather funny and 'polite' so we caved.
'I demand more cheesepuffs.' the diplomat tried.
'Nope. How do you ask? Ask nicely.'
'Cheesepuffs... please?' she tried with halfhearted shyness.

Well we had tamed this flock of international children, and in the nursery there were about eight babies and it sounded like all of them were crying at the same time. I was dismissed from the very rational, easy-looking 2 and 3 year olds and sent to the den of irrational and demanding creatures under the age of 2.
They were all crying but for no apparent reason.
Well, it turned out the little Asian boy wasn't used to napping without being held the entire nap (yeah there's been this thread on my Mom's homeschool board about how Asians are all 'tiger mothers' and super-disciplined and stuff. I call false on that one. This kid had to be held in the right position with his blanket just so and rocked at the right speed to lull him to sleep and then you could stop with the specifics but don't you dare put him down. Discipline? Ha!) The little girl from India wouldn't drink anything besides chocolate milk (#1, why does any child under 1 year know what chocolate milk and 2 why are we capitulating to said demands?) The others were crying for various reasons and I discovered one little girl from India hiding under a table with her eyes about as big as saucers. She eventually came out to eat some crackers, which quieted down her friend who came to steal said crackers from her.
We eventually got them all quieted down except for a few whimpers here and there.
Yeesh.
I did walk down the stairs with two of the momma's when I went to get some food earlier and they were just about wringing their hands about how painful it was to leave their small children with someone else for two hours.
'In India we don't do this. We are with them or if we must go out we leave with relatives. Never with someone we don't know.'
'Well, you gotta do what you gotta do,' I replied, 'and it is for so short a time only once a week. It is good for them to meet new people and learn to be flexible.'
'Oh yes but they cry and it hurts my heart to hear my little one cry so! I cannot bear it.'
'A good cry is good for them every now and then. Strengthens their lungs to they can breathe better and become good singers in the future. That's what my mom said anyway.'
'Ohhh... your mother is very wise... this is a good thing for us to think on. At least it may bring us some comfort in the following times when we must be parted!'

Now, I realize that I am VERY single and have no offspring of my own. I do realize this. And I realize that the momma-bear/tiger/ferocious animal/nurturing hormones and instincts don't kick in until one bears one's own posterity.
HOWEVER.
I was telling my boyfriend about this over lunch and his reply was, 'Sorry but do these mom's ever spank their kids? They sound waaay spoiled. Like, a good smack every now and then is healthy for a kid.'
No we are not advocating for abuse at all, just some common-sense discipline. Kids LAY DOWN FOR NAPS, in a BED, not your arms!
Not to bash on international mommas, because the mothers here in the states need plenty of lessons as well (i.e. if your child owns an ipod they gosh darned as well have earned that money themselves through their own sweat and occupation. Not through you giving it to them because they deserve it!!! They don't!)

Anyway. It was really fun and as you can see makes for a good story. There were a couple points where I thought I'd go mad when the one 3 year old would not stop screaming in a high-pitched dying rabbit sort of way, but other than that it was fun. :-)
However, I am looking forward to being back with the adults teaching them English and how to master the difficult 'b,' 'p' 'th' 'v' 'r' and 'l' sounds. We have mostly Asians in our class and these consonants/diphthong/sounds are especially hard for them to pronounce.

Off to clean the bathroom and study for Apologetics 3 before work.

~Princess Ouch~