Musing

Well, the last two weeks have been kind of wierd. You know those sweet and sour candies? They are covered on the outside with sugar that's been flavored so that its really really bitter. But once you get past the bitterness (which is still oddly sweet because its sugar) you discover a burst of sweetness that still has an edge of bitterness/sourness. I know a lot of people hate these kinds of candies, but I like them every once and a while. At first they are shocking and my tongue screams,
"what the flippin' freakin' ding dang heck did you DO this to me for?!?!?!?!" But after a few seconds it really grows on you and I find myself wanting another piece.

Well, thats what my life has been like for the last two weeks.

Part of me is just awed by God's goodness, His faithfulness, His vividly blatant presence in my life right now. He has been so near to me I can almost touch Him and hear His Holy Spirit telling me how much He loves me and how He wants the best for me and has a perfect plan for me.
The other part of me has felt rather confused, frustrated, and stressed by a few different situations that have to do with fellow brothers and sisters in the body of Christ, or my future, or God's provision.

Its frustrating that I still struggle with these doubts because God has proven Himself over and over to me, and I know that He is faithful and has a plan. I guess what I get frustrated with is my continuous doubts, mistakes, blindness, sin, etc.
Which is normal, I just wish I could hit the "Saint" status and forgoe all the pesky side effects of being human before I reach Heaven.
:-)

Anyway God brought a song to me yesterday when I was trying to pray about all of this and sort it out. A bit melodramatic, but then I'm of Gaelic and German heritage, so it's in my blood. :-)

Peace

Alone in the valley
I cry for you
To fill me with your peace
So when the lightening strikes
The thunder roars around me
Still I live in peace
You ask that I

Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God

When the fires rage
When the storms surround me
Still I live in peace
Though the mountains fall
Crashing to the ocean
Still I live in peace
You ask that I

Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God

Lead me through the valley
lead me by the streams
Restore me and draw me to you, God
To you I lift my soul
To you who makes me whole
Gently you hold me close to you
Close to you

Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God
Be still and know you are God

You're near me
You love me

You hold me
You reach me
You still me
You move me
You draw me to you, God
(repeat)

You are God!

By Rebecca St. James and Tedd T.

Anyway, I'm excited about what the future is going to bring, God is good, and this semester is ALMOST DONE!!! Woot woot!

God bless,

~Princess Ouch~